-
I’m so sick of losing people…
It’s been about 6 months, and all i have i done in that time is get close to people, only to destroy everything that i made.. everything. I lost the girl i thought i was going to marry someday. I lost myself, and still have no idea where we is. i lost one of my bestfriends, who i thought was gonna be there til i died. I lost another girl who, in my darkest of times pulled me out of the gutter, and tried to help me stand on my own two feet, and I wouldn’t, I was stupid, and wouldn’t do it, i couldnt see what was right in front of me. Now i’ve lost someone who is so much like me, and so free spirited, that it scares the living hell out of me. I’ve driven everybody away, all because I can’t figure out who the fuck I am, and what the heck i’m supposed to be doing. I have been up in New Hampshire for 2 days, and I don’t want to go home, I almost feel like nobody would even care if I came back. It’s almost like killing myself, because I already feel dead to everyone I loved.
I guess at this point, I just wish somebody would just text me, and say, look, I know you’ve made some mistakes, and that you’ve put me through alot, but I want to give you one more chance. that’s really all I want, one chance to prove everyone wrong. One chance to show that I’m not who evryone thinks that I am. I want to show that I have grown up in this past 6 months, I’ve gotten stronger. I’m not asking for full trust in me, I wouldn’t expect that, but please, all i’m asking for is somebody to talk to me, somebody to say that they will be my friend again.
I can’t keep going on without anybody. I constantly look at my phone, and see that nobody has sent me anything, and I know that it’s my own fault, but I just want one chance to show that I really am not what I was when I was depressed. I guess what I’m trying to say, is that i’ve gotten a better hold on myself, but i need people there too, or i’m gonna go crazy again just thinking about everything. the only time now that I feel truely sad is when nobody is talking to me, and all I can do is think.
-
???
What do you want from me? What do i have to do?
-
Wednesday
On Wednesday, i will be leaving for New Hampshire. My grandmother will be having surgery, of which has not been told to me, til now… It will be to remove lumps from her thyroid gland, lumps that may be cancerous… I am now officially in freak out mode, and all i wanna do is curl up in a ball, and drift away.
-
Teacher Asked For 3 Great Kings That Brought Happiness To The World.
I Answered: Smo-KING, Drink-KING And Fuc-KING. -
Lets just order pizza, rent movies, & makeout.
-
To the first guy that milked a cow…
What the Hell were you trying to do with the cow?
-
*Me speed dating*
Me:Hi, Bulbasaur, Charmander, or Squirtle?
Her: What?
Me:Aaand we’re done here. -
“It’s hard to accept the truth when lies were exactly what you wanted to hear.”
-
me: I’m actually happy right now.
life: LOL one sec. -
Its been a little over a month since I last attempted suicide, and I haven’t even thought about it for a while, But Things change, kinda like people do…
